There are ways to make dating fun, even if you aren’t interested. Let’s get real. Dating can sometimes feel uncomfortable. Especially if you’re not vibing with your date. But no worries, I’ve got you covered girlfriend. Here are a few ways to enjoy the date when you’re just not into them:
Be Positive
Sounds simple but this can be overlooked so easily. If you’re not outright vibing with your date you may as well enjoy your own company, right? And no being positive doesn’t mean you have to put on a fake smile. If we start to get into a negative headspace then we allow fear to creep in.
Inner thoughts like, “this always happens to me” or “I never get lucky on dates” can be very negative. Instead of getting bogged down, think of this as an opportunity to learn what you do not want and what you do want on a date. Positive thinking is key to turning around those thoughts and putting the focus on what you can learn from the experience.
Go in with zero expectations
Expectations are resentments waiting to happen. If we decided the date needs to be a certain way or that we expect something to happen and it doesn’t, then we can feel let down. If you go on the date with the willingness to be open and present to what comes your way then you have no reasons to be let down.
Sure it is ok to feel disappointed because you may be really excited about this person and they are not who you thought they were. But if we hold onto how we want them to be or how the date should go, then we set ourselves up with unrealistic expectations. It’s more enjoyable to go in with an open mind because hey you never know, you may be surprised at how awesome your date is!
Think of it as exchanging information
It can feel nerve wrecking going on a date. The best way to calm those nerves so that you can go in feeling collected is to think of it as exchanging information. When you strip away the excitement and “what if’s” of a date, then you truly see the date in its most simple form.
If you find yourself not enjoying the conversation this is a great way to re-center yourself. Keep in mind all you have to do is exchange information with this person and leave after the date. That’s literally it. And who knows maybe you’ll have a funny date story to share with your girlfriends!
Be true to yourself
Just because you are on this date doesn’t mean you have to follow the norms of “date etiquette.” Whatever the hell that means. Be true to yourself. If you do not want to go on a second date it is ok to tell your date in a nice way that you are not interested.
If you know instantly you are not interested then don’t feel pressured to stay a long time and chat with this person. Whatever you do, don’t compromise yourself and what you want because you feel an obligation to be nice.
At the end of the day enjoy your own damn company and that will ensure that you make dating fun!
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